Down the Middle - YC W19 Demo Day Poem

a.k.a "it's the juggernaut batch"
03.17.19 - pier 48 loading dock
San Francisco, CA

		and shmoozers
	throw hopes
				in the din
	murmurs bounce off
				warehouse walls

long 		gone	are
	the comforts of mountainview
		the carpeted floors of
the computer history museum
		here the ground is parking lot
			yellow badge founders swimming like
	sharks ready to bite any 
			dazed distance-staring alum
			thick black curtains stretch to the roof pick a side
		two hundred is too many companies to not divide
	what once was YCombined now is YSplit
and that’s also a new card type: virtual debit.
it’s the juggernaut [redacted] like Freddie Merc’s Indian roots
life’s worse when you can’t get crazy rich south asian news.
ice rain from the heavens - not Kevin, this hail
weather check insures sleet wrecks should your coverage fail.
but there’s no insurance when a hire is a blight
burn the bull off resumes with a white hot searchlight.
a generous lover, I don’t quite go greek -
a cutie in thick rims, though? yes, I’ll eatgeek.
pronto is LATAM’s firey Uber with half-a-million rides;
investors - ¡ven rapidamente! make strides!
allure puts garment mocks on models of each size and type
I know from Teespring that’s a cash cow: right swipe.
Vivian of friendshop’s pink coralogo tee pops
to get better deals and go viral bring crew when you cop.
keep your error prone analytics code deploys on lock
they call themselves avo but will they make guac?
small business purchase is great but if that’s where it ends
wonder could we have shared more words… with friends?
union apartment making $300k MRR rentals look easy
with swag on the stage in printed black sweat suits and Yeezy’s.
alpaca is API Robinhood - darning their stocks in the night
when there’s nobody there… 
cute birdy mascot makes me wanna nuzzle and nestle
that’s as close to the truth as I can get with trestle.
a founder forgets his lines but it cause of a chronic habit?
every month shipping $2MM in dank green is nabis.
‘fraud is a way of life’ it’s both true and sad
truora works to make the outcomes a little less bad.
	egg    hatch				egg
					egg			egg

come on poet. Focus! like Lincoln reading by candle
you’ll never find love if you keep losing your handle.
so here’s co-founder Joe out of Gordian - for any of you in denial,
their booking-soft underlies travel sites. I’ll take the aisle.
tuck-shirt young-dicaprio brooklyn-swag-walk
promises board are ‘biggest baddest cash buyers on the block.’ !
and finally tech to bring grub straight to your habitat
got spice like Kim Chi B, where’s my cabbage at?

in the break-space a couple burritos go down
thank you
 thank you for the food
	let it not put me to sleep

keep your baby safe
keey pour baby 
        baby safe
keep you or baby	
	 your baby 

shiok meats will shock with lab grown cell based shrimps
in a $25 Billion prawn market this game ain’t for wimps.
a friend from my Robotics class at Brown - Francois
memfault just seems like a thing that’s a thing, firmware flaws.
the German’s are coming! let’s head for the hill
but no concrete can protect us like bunkerBox will
poppy corn 2.0 is the new snack from Taali
my mom likes the texture but says after taste is the folly
did you know of a rare Kid’s Alzheimers called “Batten”?
if we can circumvent that then we should make it happen.
Xgenomes come up in green sequencing genes
the cof beams - most confident sidekick I’ve seen.
quantum computing may boggle you
not if you are the people who started AuroraQ.
portal entryways for those who need help, opens doors
with an app, with a tap, on a condo, or store.
the amount we know about our own DNA is pathetic
but why can’t we just be smarter? it’s probably genetic.
exhuming another industry from paleolithic tar pits
ai insurance machines learn on average how dinged your car gets.

and… a measly alarm sounds above
half hearted voice meeting side to side glances:
“everyone exit in an orderly fashion”

back for geopredict in some nerdy looking high-waist pants
but bold with open door for oil and gas.
brainkey for automated 3D brain diagnostics
but where’s heartkey to unlock and pop faces in lockets?
I need help. Empirically, what is true love made of?
from Loveless in Oakland, addressed to askdata.
inito goes where no man’s not hesitant
the only app in the app store that gets your pregnant.
		fading fast	droopy eyes
	six thousand dollar darth vader machine
			we 	try to ignore that p’s are q’s backwards
pocket buzz (someone wants to message me)	we can’t ignore
		that Stanford Graduate
			   	that slight bulge in the
we can’t ignore
			we the people	RAISE JAZZ HANDS
	in support of
			our steam-faced TECH BRETHREN
	 a white tech borther on a mission
on mission
		on a
					GEROSTATE ALPHA 	sleepy
	eyes shut eyes open
		my flapping gasp

“frozen at forty” when anti age drugs are
		ten years out
stem cellies
		or Jon deere for indoor farming - we could just
making bootleg nebullam merch now for the country demo
	and be
		weird plant wall thing
		a robotic “type” system
7 year slog - three year return, bearded founder CLAYTON MOONEY
	of Iowa
		he was forty seven years old

high functioning. fucktioning
		little/big chubby baby face pacifier cute
munchkin stubby toe’d munchkin little
	gimp hat - pumpky
nah, that’s cute that’s cute
			that’s cool, we’ll stay

green energy exchange im a fading tree in heavy winter
eyes sag body head keels over thursday
trying to get linked in
im so asleep I might be like: 
		the next generation of
fully licensed paper org with
	fifteen hundred on my waiting list
with bloody feet and mud smeared body
we try to be ravens and angle into water war
		a greener america
how a classroom “should look” according to TailorEd is with

	one kid passed out on their desk

feel I’m a swampy dander gazing stage for the wrong thing
crazy trainwreck brain lines take me back haighschool.
no they are presenting
blueberry medical is presenting.
how asleep am I? very. slipping off. coming away undone
	almost not existing
it’s the burritos, it’s the burritos they all complain in unison
this is the blueberrthing trying to go big
	smash the eBorder
the old square in Scotland
		where I was rug shopping in 2009

back from a break, two cookies and a decaf, switch stages 
I peek backstage two
	founders in “loonify” shirts

the fact that loonify will balloon-launch small satellites
will surely leave flat earth proponents feeling justified.
as I could use a pachama so sleepy, and dream
of a truly effectual carbon offset scheme.
from your union apartment you may get a degree, true
but college doesn’t teach anything useful: you’ll need a careertu.
a ‘we’re the next amazon’ claim comes off cocky
still at scale there’s a market for bottomless coffee.
mythical basilisk, st. peter’s basilica, vatican, rome
leave 99.9% of your NN training data at home.
54gene is a new African gene database
unlike 23andme, it expands across race.
evo bots find the flaws in titles for playstation -
they’ll replace every human game tester with automation.
man’s torso, moreso, horse, though.
techquestrians from centaur labs arrow and bow.
next time the colon doc needs a peep up your soft spot
make sure they don’t miss any polyps - use docbot.
kalshi healthy gambling where the house doesn’t always win
and it’s legal beyond the walls of the city of sin.
don’t be a poor sport - install a new doorport
and next time you’re in Santa Monica play some board sports.
long long ago, in a galaxy Verizon hopes never exists: Volk Fi
a distributed celluar system with no data plan, amazing.
lumos says 5% of all goog searches med-related
so let there be light just for doctors created.
cheaper, better employee benefits - that won’t flop
plus a dash of “god damn” is the cherry on top.
Mei instapath not be confused with the carrot cart
something full automated, up it starts.
brings releaf to inefficient African assembly lines
kind of like how brother Sam U. pumps out the rhymes.
and synova gets two ex the stem cells from FAT.
… … beliiiiieeve that!
atomic alchemy generates nuclear medicines
wondering what sort of mushroom cloud my head is in?
if world leaders had good intel, peace would have a chance
let’s paint our world in data and zip up Trump’s pants.
	for real though, donate now:
hi		i am Rob
	we remove CO2 from the air and turn it
			into gasoline. 	!

prometheus #nuffsaid

a break later my man Ruben from career karma in dope clothes
tackles job market woes and makes cash as it grows.
on my first time with PG: chat laps around Pioneer
he said “this tiny seed turns to sapling to sequoia giant o’er the years.”
we took a break right at 4:20 but I was too sick to hit Hua’s Reefer
but at least I made it back in time for the pitch from keeper.
cable TV is dying according to closer sports
it may go the way of the cathode ray, but still the logo needs work.

a perpetual taking and reliquishing of stage
a clamor of JAZZ HANDS
a “how loud should we clap for this”
a feeling of “AND NOW, THIS”
unending cycle of 3 minute distillations of 
3 months, the outset of 7 year journeys
and now, this.

trade loans with 100% collateral wouldn’t be wise
now Indian firms have a new option in Seawise. 
how often we find ourselves, mid-day, middesk
and yet rarely do we carry out biz-background checks.
	the poem.. must. go
in fact. 	I’m switching
		I’m going into: datamode
	beeeeezoop bee bop 	biddle widdle wit
beezoop bee bop 
		bit beeeeooowwwm
			beezoop bee bop beep beep 
	biddle widdle wit
		beezoop bee bop bit beeowowowowowow
now im stegged out HU HUH
steady datamode
			stegasaurus REX mother fucker 

data mode. all facts. never fictional
an improvement on old ass EDI’s like convictional.
I sleep in my mom’s basement - but only tell my closest friends
on a new social media app… we know how this ends.
encarte is a one stop checkout across pages
a passport to 30k smaller ecomm destinations.
it will be a supernova. a brilliant light!
takes design mocks and spins them into code that’s… alright.
	oof… I’m winded. yikes yikes
		a sail torn
oh ok shit here I am. 
	it’s um it’s called 	
a company that does things
		don’t let students waste money
	this is draining, time remaining?
could someone put a clock up?
		docbot, out your butt
	but then up, becomes dockup
or then there’s pershop it’s the perfect bazaar
that shows just what you like and knows what size you are.
or for gaming enemy on board brings togeth mafia and LOL
so a made to watch MOBA that’s perfect for trolls.
taobotics’ bots bring the coke aisle to YOU
an automate selfie opp and sales improved.
what’s next. JAZZ
		this is windsor
			the brain grows thin
how many companies? K-Complexes? Sleep-spindles?
	I’m inside out I’m inside out I’m inside In.
cargo crate hovership boundary layer
	hydrofoil fast as the air freight quarter the cost
mew mew
blub blub blub 		and  		WOW
what is this? something for me? as a Lactose intolerant?
eclipse has micelle milk magic - for vegans and asians

at heart we build it - 19 person electric planes
my water based heart wrestles an electric brain.
don’t forget the underscore when you _rebank
better bank helps companies send money.
	a man with the voice of a podcast producer
explains preflight can help you test code before users	
			J			ZZ
a tooth in the
	best wind farm in the lands buy and build sell for 4x
trying my best traversing this wild vortex
	JAZZ hands but let’s be honest the problem is jizz
and the solve is uncomfy until your choice gives
	 	a new man-pill an option will can condone
when I rush to go buy them I won’t be alone
	the prospect alone gives old dogs
		 new bones
and lest forget schoolable helping with 
private school access in poorer nations…
odd reiki 					HANDS
o	ff			record

“hey um, I think your bathroom needs more toilet paper
	and… more possibilities.”

toodles til
d nxt batch